I wanna end the year on a positive note, and what better way for me than to find some positivity in the single most disappointing trilogy I’ve ever watched: The Star Wars Sequels! These are the top ten BEST things to emerge from the Star Wars Sequels! And no, don’t worry, this isn’t disguised toxicity!
An admirable case of serendipity; when the puffins of Skellig Michael couldn’t be moved, Rian Johnson and his crew decided to simply digitally alter them into these ridiculously cute critters. The end result? Quite possibly the most popular animals ever to come from Star Wars! I like porgs, I really do! Their design is so simple, yet memorable: little owl bodies, duck feet, and cat-like faces! Simple, alien, yet elegant; a winning design!
9- Bi-con Poe Dameron
I don’t have the best gaydar around, and even I could tell there was SOMETHING going on with him and Finn; even if it was a one-sided crush! Portrayed by the unequaled Oscar Isaac, Poe Dameron’s the type of guy who can fly right in, do the daring rescue, and then fly off into the sunset with a man in his arms. Or a woman, because bisexuals exist and Poe can be Bi, what with his canonical previous relationship with Zorii. The sole reason, and I’m 100% convinced of this, that we DON’T have Poe as a canon Queer is because Disney’s too chicken shit to canonize it. But you can’t deny that Poe is, at the very least, Bi. Very, very Bi.
The Sequels has a TON of flaws, I won’t deny it. But BB-8 ain’t one of them! Well, OK, he was severely underused in Rise of Skywalker, but the same could be said for…everyone in that movie NOT named Rey or Kylo Ren, really.
7- Kylo Ren’s Lightsaber
Honestly, I think the revealing shot of Kylo Ren holding this crossguard lightsaber is what had us curious the most about The Force Awakens back in 2014. There was a coolness factor to how different the saber looked, to the point many of us were wondering how the villain (whom we’d later know was called Kylo Ren) would use it. I actually own TWO toy versions of this weapon!
6- Daisy Ridley
Way back when the cast was revealed in late 2014, you may have heard a loud tack-tack-tack. That was the sound of Star Wars fanatics googling who Daisy Ridley was, only to find a simple answer: she’s a hottie. Before Star Wars 7, Daisy Ridley was an unknown, but now, there’s millions upon millions of people who know, love, and admire her and her character of Rey Skywalker. And I’m really glad for her, because she seems like such a sweetheart! I wish her success in the future! She certainly deserves it!
5- Adam Driver’s Acting
This. Guy. Can. ACT! WOW! Kylo Ren kinda sucks as a character, BUT THAT AIN’T ON ADAM! This dude may well be the BEST actor to grace Star Wars with his skills since Ewan McGregor! You seen him in Marriage Story? THAT’S THE SCENE THAT GOT HIM THE OSCAR NOMINATION!
4- The Lego Star Wars Holiday Special
Lego. Star Wars Sequel characters. Time travel. A Star Wars Holiday Special. A recipe for disaster? By all rights it should have been, but it wasn’t. Instead, it was quite possibly the funniest holiday special of 2020. I bust a gut laughing! I actually wish it was LONGER!
3- Undercover Boss: Starkiller Base from SNL
Maybe it’s not the BEST SNL skit ever, but for us Star Wars fans, it’s the funniest skit of the 2010’s at the very least. The skit is memorable, quotable, and for me personally, the finest parody of Star Wars since Spaceballs…the movie, not the show.
2- John Boyega
This guy! Hooo boy, THIS guy! This BASED son of a gun! I’m telling you, this guy’s the most admirable, most bad ass mofo to grace Star Wars since Samuel L. Jackson! When the racist Reylos went after him for JOKINGLY saying Finn will get with Rey in the future, he MOCKED them! When the Black Lives Matter movement was gaining steam in 2020 and other celebrities were content just tweeting support, John Boyega was hitting the streets and giving mad speeches! When other actors were being coerced into silencing their dissatisfaction with the Sequels, John Boyega literally said “I will NOT be silenced!”
THIS MAN IS AN IDOL! HE’S MY IDOL!!!
Before we continue to Number 1, here’s some honorable mentions…
Babu Frik: that little guy from Rise of Skywalker who totally stole the show! Honestly the best thing to come out of that movie!
Newfound appreciation for the Prequels: We fans used to think the Prequels were the worst that Star Wars could ever get, and then Last Jedi happened. Now a new generation of fans, plus a previous generation of haters, have a new appreciation for the Prequel Trilogy, giving it the love it deserves.
Rey Theories: For two whole years, fans theorized on the mysterious origins of Rey, with one of the more popular theories being that she was a Kenobi. Then Last Jedi happened and it turned out she was nobody. Then Rise of Skywalker happened, and it turned out she was a Palpatine, but she adopted herself into the Skywalker family, so now she’s a Skywalker. Trying to figure out who she is was way more fun than finding out.
Number 1: Loan Tran, better known as Kelly Marie Tran
Rose Tico? Not the best character ever, deserves all the criticism. Kelly Marie Tran? Fantastic actress who WILL become a household name by decade’s end! Don’t believe me? Watch the scene where Rose is introduced in The Last Jedi. Watch how this girl brings her character to life and runs an emotional gauntlet like a pro! Watch her go from crying her eyes out, to fangirling over her hero, to getting crushed that her hero isn’t who she thought she was, to the cold professionalism in how she stuns him with her stun gun! It’s honestly my favorite scene in the movie, meaning it’s the only scene I remotely like.
Now I’m hearing talk that she’s going to voice the next Disney Princess? That’s HUGE news! It’s not just ANYONE who can become a voice actress for Disney, much less for one of their flagship franchises! Kelly Marie, your future’s looking BRIGHT!